ACCORDING TO STATISTICS, the average engagement time in the
lead up to the big day is 13 months. That's a lot of time devoted to
planning and dealing with those inevitable glitches that will arise,
and the amount of pressure that brides- to -be find themselves under
can be immense. But don't reach for the valium just yet - there's a
load of practical techniques out there that are guaranteed to keep stress to an absolute minimumYoga
When you feel as if you're being tied up in knots with all the running around, you could try relaxing by literally tying yourself up in knots! The ancient practice of yoga is a tried and tested means of acheiving inner peace. That sounds like a terrible cliche, but the breathing and posture techniques used in yoga are actually designed to clear the mind, and it's perfect for getting rid of all those niggling little worries that can keep you awake at night. And you don't have to have elastic legs to do it. The most basic exercises will produce results - all you need is a mat. Pointers can be found on the internet, in an introductory book or at your local leisure centre. It's not for everyone, though, and if you have an impatient personality to begin with, chances are you'll soon get cross rather than cross-legged.
Reflexology
This is a more costly option, but those who've tried it will tell you just how amazing this therapy can be. Pressure and massage to the feet sends waves of well-being throughout the whole body and relieves tension, which explains the dreamy grin you see on recipients as they emerge from the treatment room. If, however, you are ticklish and giggle like a schoolgirl whenever anyone goes near your tootsies, there's an alternative reflexology treatment called the Indian head massage. You know the way the best part of a trip to the hairdresser's is getting your head massaged when it's being shampooed? Well, it's like that, only ten times better, as gentle pressure is also applied to the neck, back, arms and face. And, unlike a trip to the stylist, the reflexologist will mercifully refrain from asking if you're "going anywhere nice for your holidays" or if you're "seeing anyone special". Expert Marion Lawson, at Edinburgh Reflexology, is herself a bride-to-be, and will be taking a dose of her own medicine in the months to come.
Pamper days
Again, this can be done one of two ways. The ideal solution would be a girls' day out to a health spa - courtesy of the groom, perhaps? - where facials, mudbaths and the hands-on experience of Clint the hunky masseuse would see the stress simply drain away. But the wedding day itself is going to take a bite out of the bank balance, so a less costly option would be to spoil yourself at home. The key here is for someone else - mum, sister or best friend - to organise it, so that you're not flying around trying to please others. And the great thing about a group of girls getting together to do face masks and the like is that it almost invariably leads to laughter and general silliness, the greatest stress-busters around.
Exercise
This doesn't have to be a two-hour slogathon in the gym. In fact, the gym is probably best avoided, as the potential to actually increase stress is huge. If you don't get a fright by seeing all your wobbly bits reflected in the mirror when you're on the treadmill, you are bound to break down in tears because you still haven't mastered the workings of the step machine. Some gentle exercise, such as a nice walk or a leisurely few lengths in the pool, will release those all-important endorphins that make you feel exhilarated and energised. An added bonus is that the extra exertion will hopefully help bring about a sound, deep sleep, which is definitely one of the most essential factors in mental well-being.
Music
Anyone who's ever been in a room with a hairbrush, a mirror and a tape of Whitney Houston's "I Wanna Dance With Somebody" will know all too well the theraputic benefits of a good singing session. If you're driving home from work with the radio on, don't be afraid to sing along. It's a really effective stimulation technique, costs nothing, and can be done on a regular basis. For obvious reasons, don't join in if Air Supply's "All By Myself" comes on. If, however, your vocal skills are in danger of shattering the windscreen, just listening to some relaxing music can help reduce anxiety. In this respect, remember to choose your CDs carefully. Music is a great medium, but it also has the potential to bring on sad or melancholy moods, so avoid break-up songs.
Do something else instead
Put a limit on the amount of time spent discussing/planning the wedding, and set aside time for other stuff. This could be anything from reading a book or watching a film, to going on a day out somewhere unusual or having a meal where wedding chat is strictly off the menu. Obsessing about every little detail can eventually take the excitement out of it all, so that getting married can seem like a military operation rather than the unique, thrilling occasion it should be.
And finally...
Listen to the advice of those who've already been through it. Practically every bride in history will tell you that, for all the crises and mini-dramas along the way, the day turned out brilliantly in the end. If you worry yourself sick over the preparations, you're denying yourself the enjoyment to be had in the lead up to what is one of the most important occasions of your life. It's gonna be just fine, so don't stress with the dress!
Got a health and beauty question? Get help from other brides-to-be at the SWD Forum... CLICK HERE!
