Mother of the bride etiquette

DON’T put your head in the sand

Don’t be put off shopping because of a body part you’d rather hide than show off, we all have them and postponing your shopping trip because of a quest for perfection will only make things more frantic later on. Instead, find an outfit that minimises your problem area and think of it as a bonus if you do manage to lose those bingo wings.

DO remember whose wedding it is

Most mums will have to learn to bite their tongue at some point during the wedding plans. But just because the bride’s not doing things the way you would doesn’t necessarily mean she’s wrong! When it comes to giving your opinion, it's best to follow this mother of the bride etiquette: only give your opinion if it’s asked for. And even then, do so as gently as you can!

DON’T make big decisions without the bride

Even for small, seemingly unimportant wedding purchases, it is always best to consult the bride. She may feel like you’re being overbearing if you turn up at her front door with wedding supplies  in hand, even if you thought you were being helpful getting her a few bits and bobs. There has to be a balance though, so don’t back off to the extent that the couple don’t even realise you would like to have some input.

DO let them know you’re there for them

Even couples who like to think they’re organising the whole day themselves will probably reach a point where it all gets a bit much and they throw up their hands and say ‘MUM, HELP!’ So tell them right at the start that you’re very excited about the whole thing and are willing to help out any way you can, even if it’s just to lend an ear when she wants a moan about the bridesmaids .

DON’T ignore advice from the experts

If you’re having trouble finding an elegant mother of the bride outfit for the big day, it may be that you’re in need of a fresh eye to look at the situation, so get some help from the pros. Tell the sales assistants exactly what you’re looking for and be open-minded as to what you’ll try on. It’s amazing how other people can be a better judge of what suits us sometimes, and we can all be guilty of getting stuck in a style rut.

DO remember to have lots of fun as you prepare

Shopping trips are a great excuse for fun days out and these kinds of experiences can be great for pre-wedding bonding with the mother of the groom too. And don’t forget to tell your daughter or daughter-in-law-to-be that you’d love to come along to the hen party, so that she can ask the chief bridesmaid to plan something suitable for all ages.

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